cremation services in Phoenix, AZ

Be Patient with the Dying

Before cremation services in Phoenix, AZ, you may be taking care of a loved one who is terminally ill. When the terminal illness is first diagnosed, your loved one may still be relatively independent and able to make decisions and do everything for themselves. In the early days of many terminal illnesses, it may be impossible, from the outset, to see any evidence of the disease that will take your loved one’s life.

However, as time passes, the terminal illness will progress and as it does, all the capabilities of your loved one will diminish. They will become more and more dependent on you for everything and more and more of your time will be spent caring for them and attending to all their needs.

While in the end stage (the last three to six months) of your loved one’s terminal illness, you may have them in hospice care at home, the reality is that the bulk of their care will fall on you. There are many side effects to caring for someone who is terminally ill that people may not be aware of.

One is that it’s inevitable that your sleep patterns will change for the worse. As your loved one’s terminal illness progresses, you will sleep very lightly, if at all, as you listen for any sound that indicates that your loved one is awake or needs you to help them with something. Additionally, as they get to the very end of life, they may sleep erratically, falling asleep early in the evening and then being wide awake in the wee hours of the morning.

This will result in you being fatigued, which in turn can make you less patient, even with routine tasks you do for them and routine questions they may ask. This may be evident in you answering them harshly or trying to rush them through activities that, because of their illness, take them much longer to do.

One of the other things that may happen, especially in the last few weeks or days before your loved one dies, is cognitive impairment. There are several reasons for this, but you may find yourself having to repeat things continually, having to deal with delusions and hallucinations, and having to listen and respond to things that don’t make sense.

This can be frustrating, because nothing you say or do seems to be understood or to stick with your loved one. That frustration can lead to impatience with them.

You may feel horrible as you recognize your impatience, because you know it’s not their fault and you know that’s not how you want to be. And your impatience may make them feel horrible and may result in tears or anger from them.

There are three things that you can do to be more patient with a love one who is dying. One of these is simply to change your sleeping routine, temporarily, to match theirs. If they take a nap during the day, you take a nap too (this dishes and laundry will wait).

The second thing you can do is to put yourself in their place and think about how you would want them to react to you if you were doing what they are doing. It can be hard in the moment, but doing this invariably brings out patience.

And the third thing you can do is simply take a deep breath before you respond. This puts a pause on your emotions, your thinking, and your words and gives you the opportunity to calm down and hold your peace.

If you want to know more about cremation services in Phoenix, AZ, our compassionate and experienced staff at Simply Cremations & Funeral Arrangements can help. You can come by our funeral home at 16952 W Bell Rd., Ste 303, Surprise, AZ 85374, or you can contact us today at (623) 975-9393.

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